


A day at the Black Jackals office

by Niamidan



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Bokuto does not take off his ugly wolf mask, Crack, Humor, Kiyoomi hates them all, M/M, Meian is done with all of them, office stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:47:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27192635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Niamidan/pseuds/Niamidan
Summary: He looks at the camera still wearing his ugly wolf mask and his feet bouncing up and down the ground. He shrugs, "Omi-kun isn't that friendly, but it's fine, I know he cares about me."---"He's a fucking idiot," Sakusa Kiyoomi says from where the camera is filming him with his legs crossed and his mask covering his face.Or alternatively- MSBY office au, full of crack and idiots.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Comments: 14
Kudos: 127





	A day at the Black Jackals office

**Author's Note:**

> Got this idea after looking at the office and reading Reddit office shit. I thought it would be funny. Some of these stories are taken from Reddit!

Bokuto Kotarou walks into the office with his handbag over his shoulder and whistling a song out of tune. He walks past Inunaki who's staring at him like he's grown an extra head overnight. He wasn't very far from it with a werewolf mask (oddly lacking fur) draped over his face to work. 

"Hey hey hey! What's up my number one disciple!" He says while making finger guns at Hinata Shouyo who looks confused. The younger guy looks at him for a second then stares at the camera as if asking if he missed something. He holds his papers close to his chest. "Uh, Bokuto-san did I forget something today?" He asks. 

The man underneath the mask sighs and shakes his head in disappointment. He lays a hand on the orange-haired boy "I can't believe my disciples is so stupid. It's Halloween! Have you forgotten?" Bokuto says turning away with crossed arms looking like he's sulking which was odd due to the ugly wolf mask he's wearing. 

"Y-yes? I thought Halloween was in two days?" Hinata says a little awkwardly. Bokuto turns to him again with his arms open to make him look even more dramatic. "Stupid Hinata! In our office we celebrate all the days up until Halloween, it's a tradition!" He says and walks away from Hinata who looks even more concerned due to his lack of knowledge about this. 

The camera turns to Inunaki sitting at his desk looking at the camera with a deadpan look. 

\-----

Inunaki is sitting on a chair looking like he couldn't care less, his hands are held together over his lap. One of his fingers keeps tapping his other hand while he stares at the camera. 

"Of course that's bullshit," He says with as much enthusiasm as his expression. "We don't have that kind of a tradition at our office." 

He stays quiet for a minute and then he smirks just a little bit "Of course I'm not telling Hinata that." 

\----

Bokuto walks away from a stunned Hinata and opens his mouth to greet Sakusa Kiyoomi who's holding a cup of coffee sitting at his desk while staring at his computer. "Hey, you doing good my dude-" He's cut off when Kiyoomi turns to him with a glare and hisses. 

Bokuto holds up his hands in surrender "Or maybe not, that's cool too" He continues to make his way to his own desk ignoring the agonizing glare that follows him until he's a few meters away. 

\---

He looks at the camera still wearing his ugly wolf mask and his feet bouncing up and down the ground. He shrugs, "Omi-kun isn't that friendly, but it's fine, I know he cares about me." 

\---

"He's a fucking idiot," Sakusa Kiyoomi says from where the camera is filming him with his legs crossed and his mask covering his face. 

\---

He makes his way to his desk and greets his neighbor Miya Atsumu who's talking on the phone. The fake blond he's holding nail polish in one hand and painting his other fingers in black paint. The phone is smashed between his ear and his shoulder, he greets Bokuto with a nod. 

"Oh my god, no girl, that's not the way to do it, ya know yer worth is more than that- seriously I mean it. Geez, flattery will get you everywhere~" Atsumu says while rolling his eyes to show Bokuto his irritation. "So, I'll register ya as a customer with us, yea? Oh girl, don't even think about, ya know I'm here for ya. It was a pleasure doing business with ya~" He says and hangs up the call. 

He puts down the nail polish and starts typing something on his computer then turns to Bokuto who is taking out some of his files from his bag. "Ey, what's up Bokkun? Nice mask ya got there, is it a naked chicken?" He asks grinning at him innocently. 

Bokuto turns to him in an instant looking extremely mad that Atsumu had gotten his mask wrong. "How dare you! It's obviously a wolf, damn Tsum-Tsum didn't think you were this much of an idiot." He says and turns back to his own work. 

Atsumu just smiles at him with his elbow resting on his desk and his hand on his cheek. He's looking at the other like he's staring at a child, his eyes divert for a split second to the camera and winks before his gaze is on Bokuto again. "My mistake Bokkun, It looks lovely on ya" He puts his hand down from the desk and goes back to his computer.

\---

"Tsum- Tsum is probably the best at work, he gets the customer's favorability whenever he's on call, but he's an idiot," Bokuto says while still looking at the camera with his ugly mask on. He stays quiet as the camera zooms into his face. 

\---

"Sakusa Kiyoomi, I am done with your shit" A voice booms from the other room beside the office. Kiyoomi slowly turns around in his chair to look at his boss who comes out from the room in angry steps. 

The camera turns to Inunaki who's trying to hold back his laugh from behind his desk however his snickering can still be heard. The camera goes back to Kiyoomi now sporting his signature frown. 

Shuugo Meian walks up to Kiyoomi pointing his finger at the other in anger. "You- you! argh, I can't continue with this Sakusa, how many times do I have to cover for your ass when I get calls from customers complaining about you calling them 'shitheaded piece of trash'." He near shouts and suddenly there is full-blown laughter in the background. 

The camera switches from Meian who is looking confused and goes to Inunaki who pretends to pick up another call. He looks at the camera for a split second and then almost like an illusion is back to writing things down in his notebook. 

The camera is back to Meian who just shakes off his confusion and looks back at Kiyoomi with less anger than before. He raises his hand to rub at his temple to ease the tension building up. "What do you have to say for yourself this time?" He asks. 

Kiyoomi tilts his head and finally sighs while taking off his mask. "With all due respect, sir- they were being a shitheaded piece of trash," He says with no hint of emotions to go with his passive tone. 

Meian looks at him like he wants to scream, his face grows red in frustration and he shakes his hands like he wants to choke him. He lets out a cry of frustration. "I'm sick of you guys god damn it! I should fire you all, I should fire you for insulting customers" He points to Kiyoomi who shrugs and goes back to his computer. 

Meian points to Bokuto next "I should fire you for wearing that hideous mask in the office even though it's not Halloween yet" He points to Inunaki who's playing a shooting game on his laptop. "I should fire you for never working and always playing that stupid game of yours." 

He turns to Hinata "You're still in training so I can't fire you yet but I should do it to save myself the trouble of another idiot on my team" Hinata whimpers and runs away crying still holding his papers from earlier. 

Meian turns and looks at Atsumu who has his eyes wide with his hands up in the air. "You're actually good at your work but you're an asshole so I should fire you too," He says and Atsumu lets out a "hey! rude" Meian finally gives up and walks into his own room slamming the door shut. 

The camera zooms in on each of their faces, only Kiyoomi looks like the whole thing didn't bother him and continues to do his own work. 

\----

Meian has his chin in his hand looking away from the camera and seeming irritated. He finally looks at the camera with pink dusting his cheeks. "That was a shameful display, I promise I'm not always like that," He says looking a little sheepishly at the ground. 

\----

Kiyoomi continues to stare at the camera his expression never changing. "He's always like that," he says and the room grows quiet until the cameraman asks "What do you think of Meian-san?" 

He raises his eyebrow and seems to contemplate the question for a bit. "I respect him," He says with finality.   
  
"Anything else-" The cameraman tries but is cut off when Kiyoomi says. "I respect him" once again. It becomes silent until the cameraman says "okay then. . ." 

\-----

Inunaki is sitting on his desk with an expression of dread, the camera is close to his face but he isn't looking at it. Instead, he's staring at the distance looking like he wants to die. Finally, he takes up the phone on his desk and smashes in a few numbers waiting for the person on the other side to pick up the call. 

"What do you want Inunaki?" Meian says when he picks up and the dark shadow over Inunaki seems to grow as he says with a serious voice "I need to leave". The other end of the call goes quiet. 

Finally, Meian speaks again "May I ask why?" 

Inunaki lowers his head and there's darkness covering his eyes, he continues with a glum voice. "I'm bleeding from my anal," He says and there's no instant response from the manager. After a while, Meian asks hesitantly "Should I call an ambulance-" He starts but is instantly cut off by Inunaki. 

"I'm going to drive myself there." He says and after a long period of silence Meian finally gives him the okay to leave. He stands to leave and the camera zooms into the patch of blood on his desk chair.

\---

This time Meian is looking at the camera with eyes mildly wide and an unreadable expression. "I don't wanna know, I don't care and I heard nothing," He says and continues to stare at the camera with eyes wide almost like he wasn't really looking at it. 

\---

Hinata snaps a photo of Miya Atsumu laying on the ground with his tie a little loose and shit a bit open to reveal his collarbone. He's staring at the phone with a seductive look. "Did ya take it correctly Shouyo-kun?" He asks and sits up a bit from the ground. 

Hinata nods eagerly and turns the phone to show the other the pictures he had taken. "You looked very sexy Atsumu-san," Hinata responds. Atsumu smiles in glee looking at the photo's taken of him, he does look very appealing. 

"Hey, give me that glass of water," He asks Hinata who hands him the glass on top of the desk beside them. Atsumu splashes the water in the glass on his hair and pushes some of his now wet hair back a little. "Quick take a photo!" he says and Hinata is quick to do as he's asked. 

The camera is pointed at Atsumu who continues to make different poses and then it turns to Sakusa Kiyoomi who's holding the now empty glass in his hands. He stares at the camera with his deadpan face still wearing his mask. 

\----

"He's a disgusting bitch" Kiyoomi says with his tone still even and his legs still crossed. He thinks about it for a second and then adds "I hate him." He nods to himself holding his sharp gaze on the camera. 

\---

"Listen here my number one disciple, the other day I was going to get some water for myself from the water dispenser," Bokuto says still wearing the same mask from the other day. Hinata nods showing that he's listening attentively. 

Sakusa Kiyoomi walks past them glaring when he goes by for no reason. Bokuto goes quiet, looking like he is contemplating something. Hinata tilts his head in confusion and then he hears Kiyoomi screech. "Don't touch me!" It's followed by "Omi-omi, this is why ya have no friends here." 

Bokuto looks at Hinata again his face unreadable behind the ugly wolf mask. "Yeah, so I walk to the bathroom afterward because I drank too much. You wouldn't believe what I saw there."He says. 

\---

He's in a hurry feeling his bladder about to explode so he opens the door without any hesitation only to be greeted by Sakusa and what he assumes is Atsumu hiding his face in Sakusa's neck. The camera zooms at the two who are panting and Atsumu sitting on the sink with Kiyoomi looking oddly irritated at the camera. 

The camera looks back at Bokuto who has his eyes wide and only shuts the door when Atsumu lets out a moan. 

\---

"I really didn't need to hear the sounds Tsum-Tsum makes. That's absolutely disgusting" Bokuto says from where he is sitting at the chair to look up at the camera. The wolf mask doesn't leave his face. 

\---

"Bokuto was the last one of us to find out, really," Meian says, he's rubbing his temples again. "I've had the unfortunate luck of catching them with their pants down" He looks at the camera once again with his eyes mildly wide open like he is traumatized. 

"I don't wanna know, I don't care and I heard nothing," He says.

\---

"No, I am not going to tell you what I've seen them doing," Inunaki says with a frown on his face, he nearly shouts with how loud his voice comes out. "I've seen enough that's all you need to know" he finishes. They stay quiet.

"How did it go at the hospital?" The cameraman finally asks. 

Inunaki bounces his foot which causes some small movement in his whole body. He doesn't say anything and instead, he purses his lips. 

\---

"Yeah, I did catch them before Bokuto-san" Hinata's eyes widen at the implication and quickly adds "I-I o-only saw them k-kissing," He says becoming red in the face almost like a tomato. 

"T-they're c-cute I guess? I don't understand why Omi-san calls him a bitch though" Hinata says looking at the camera innocently. 

\----

Atsumu stares at the camera with an unsettling smile, his eyes are closed which is unusual because he doesn't smile with his eyes closed. "I'm not the one who starts it, omi-omi is just very impatient," He says and finally he opens his eyes letting out a sigh to release all the tension in his body.

"I do feel guilty about it but Omi-omi is the boss, I can't say no to him and I don't want to because I like him," Atsumu says brushing his hair away looking like a lovesick fool.

\---

"What do you think about Miya-san?" The cameraman asks. 

Kiyoomi rolls his eyes and stares at the camera. "I told you, he's a bitch" after staying quiet for a while he adds "I hate him".

**Author's Note:**

> I really really hope you guys leave a kudo or a comment to let me know what u think. I was hoping to write more if it's recieved well!


End file.
